A limerick (/ˈlɪmərɪk/) is a form of verse, and while seldom humorous and frequently rude, they forever have my stamp of approval!

(Creds to Galex and Aron for helping write these)

I’m feeling quite a bit of dread,
All my research! Ousted for a bowl from bread,
	I’d truly call ‘simp’,
	But I get it, with just a glimpse,
I’d go to Panera too, for any guy named _________ (26)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
“To only eat with chopsticks or a fork,
Which of the sides do you implore?”
	With a spoon in one hand,
	I spoke, took a stand,
“I must say that it’s neither _____ ” (5)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Like a chess player that just lost their rook,
I must admit, I’m a little bit shook!
	I’m feeling quite dense,
	My analogies don’t make sense,
I’m babbling, just like a _______ (6)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
It’s a feeling I cannot truly boast,
Oversleeping for class scares me the most!
	With a burger in my nest,
	At least I don’t live in the west,
Thank goodness for living on the east _______! (7)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Like a continuously jammed printer,
In my side there remains a splinter!
	Fallen into the snow,
	How I thought I had to let go,		
How I almost lost one of my kermits last ________ (2)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Is it a plane? A train? A soundproofed school bus with kids smoking blunts?
No, no, no, it's an unsuspicious white van cruising, Michal driving in front.
	Completely un-creepy
	And not at all a bit seedy
Just a driver on a road trip. One could say mans on the ______ (6)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
And while we may think so, do we truly know
a cheetah's top speed? It could be going quite slow
	for it has nothing to fear
	with no natural predators near.
I propose we (car-)chase one in a tunnel and see how fast it can ____ (5)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
He pauses to admire his work, but it's simply atilt!
And with a hearty sigh, he grabs the needle by the hilt.
	Yet it doesn't make a dent,
	So to his gains, he begins to lament:
"Oh, I wish I was a bit more ________" (4)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
An opossum is as alive as a man, 
But in Georgia, they drop what they can!
	Forgetting the peach,
	‘Possum drop they beseech, 
I can’t really say that I _______ (8)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
As he lies on the floor, he swears he hears a hum
But unfortunately, he can't figure out where it's coming from
	He supposes that if he were to stand
	He'd most likely come up with a solid plan
There's just one little flaw: Getting off the floor would be simply _______ (1) 

BACK TO HOME

click on me!